[bluidkiti]

January 2

Quote of the Week

"If I’m feeling hysterical, it must be historical."

Before recovery, I often wondered why little things caused such big reactions in me. I was often filled with rage when somebody drove too slowly, or I hurt for days over someone’s negative comments about me. Other things that didn’t go my way often caused oversized reactions, leaving me confused and resentful. I suffered many painful emotional hangovers from these events, and this only fueled my drinking—which led to a different kind of hangover.

By doing my Step work, I began to untangle the strings of my emotional past. Through journaling and inventories, I learned to look beyond these events and to the real causes of my feelings. What I uncovered were the old wounds and hurts from long ago, the historical causes and conditions of my hysterical reactions. Once I recognized that events were merely buttons triggering old feelings, my real emotional recovery began.

Today, I recognize uncomfortable feelings for what they are: guides into emotional areas that still need healing. I use questions to help me deal with these old wounds. “What is really behind this reaction?” “What can I do, right now, to soothe myself?” Where is the path to recovery here?” These kinds of questions are the tools I use to help me heal, and so avoid the bigger-than-life reactions that used to make my life unmanageable. Today, I uncover, discover, and discard those old hurts.