[bluidkiti]

Big Book Study - Post #34

Good Morning all!

Today we will begin on page 122 - "The Family Afterward." The
dynamics of a family that has endured alcoholism are skewed to the
point where living together has become difficult, sometimes almost
impossible. Written many years before Alanon and Alateen were
formed, this and the preceding chapter attempt to steer us all--
alcoholic or not--down the spiritual path.

Paragraph 3 on page 122 is a theme that is oft repeated throughout
the book: "Cessation of drinking is but the first step away from a
highly strained, abnormal condition." AA isn't a "not drinking
club". Reading to page 127 the advice is offered to all--alcoholic
or not--that patient striving is required to become free of the past
and to grow into something better. Although we want results now, we
must realize that it will take time to recover on all different
levels.

On page 127, the first paragraph reminds us to be cautious about
focusing on a single aspect of our recovery. "The head of the house
ought to remember that he is mainly to blame for what befell his
home. He can scarcely square the account in his lifetime. But he
must see the danger of over-concentration on financial success.
Although financial recovery is on the way for many of us, we found we
could not place money first. For us, material well-being always
followed spiritual progress; it never preceded." If we concentrate
on our spiritual condition we will mend financially.

The following paragraph directs us to make our efforts under our own
roofs. "Since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is
well that a man exert himself there. He is not likely to get far in
any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his
own roof. We know there are difficult wives and families, but the
man who is getting over alcoholism must remember he did much to make
them so."

The underlying message here is about balance. An overemphasis on any
single area creates imbalance. Those areas that are neglected
suffer. Balance is something to be sought after. Over-concentration
on finances, spirituality, meeting attendance, relationships, etc.,
at the expense of those other things that comprise this life will
lead us to more difficulty. Remembering that life is lived outside
of the rooms of AA is important.

With our next post we will start on page 128. The discussion will
start with how the family reacts to a "stirring spiritual
experience."

Thanks for participating!

Jim - The Into Action Group of Manhattan